Yesterday, I had the honor of seeing Kyle Cease speak at Seaside Spiritual Center in Encinitas, CA. I saw him several months ago in Los Angeles at the Alex Theater, which was a venue with thousands of people. This was an intimate gathering of just a couple hundred people. I attended the 11 am service and he was the Kyle that I saw before – both hilarious and inspirational – blending his signature style of comedy and personal and spiritual development. But the afternoon workshop would show another side of Kyle.
In the middle of the workshop, Kyle broke down in tears. His mom died a few months prior and this was his first Thanksgiving without her. Kyle stood on that stage and cried and told us how much he missed his mom. His outpouring of emotion touched me deeply and I felt compelled to share it. In a world where we “should” all over ourselves in order to be accepted, successful, and loved, Kyle had the courage to step outside of that and be vulnerable, raw, and authentic.
I observed my ego as it tried to make sense of what I was witnessing. I saw that my ego was uncomfortable and heard it tell me, “isn’t he embarrassed to break down in front of so many people? Shouldn’t he go back stage and get himself together?” I observed my ego wanting to fix it, to make him feel better. The uncomfortableness of my ego in that moment showed me my relationship to vulnerability and the story that had been playing in my life, which is completely contrary to how I want to live.Witnessing Kyle’s vulnerability had a profound effect on me and I’m so grateful.
Kyle Cease embodied self-love in that moment when he broke down on stage. He WAS love. It was the most authentic moment that I have witnessed of anyone on stage before. I felt the love for his mother and for his daughter and his wife and all of the pain and heartbreak of broken expectations. Kyle had the courage to let the love and sadness flow through him and allow us to witness it.
As was true for many, I grew up in a family where we didn’t talk about unpleasant emotions. I think this was a mindset passed down from generation to generation. I was taught not to feel anything but pleasantness, and if I did, don’t show it. Don’t make anyone else uncomfortable.
But this culture of hiding emotions doesn't do anyone any favors. Life is full of sadness and heartache and challenges. We are all human and all suffer from time to time. It’s in our nature. Letting the emotions flow through us is a natural and beautiful part of life. When we allow ourselves to feel and be vulnerable and authentic, the emotions wash through us, freeing us and creating more space for love. The alternative is to attempt to ignore the feelings and stuff them down where they get stuck, build up walls, and create separateness, impeding our ability to have loving relationships.
Thank you, Kyle Cease, for reminding me of the importance of being vulnerable and authentic. Thank you for reminding me that it's okay and important to feel. Thank you for giving me the opportunity to check my ego and my story around showing emotions and being real. Thank you for allowing me to witness such a beautiful moment of pure love, opening my own heart even more.
I encourage you to watch your stories around vulnerability. Are you hiding behind a story from your childhood and if so, how is it serving you? What is the worst thing that would happen if you allowed your vulnerability to show? What kind of connection might you be able to gain with others if you allowed yourself to get real? When we have the courage to stand up and say, “this is me” without fear, we can experience a freedom that changes the way we relate to ourselves and others.
If any of this struck a chord with you and you could benefit from coaching around a certain issue, contact me today. I’m here for you.
Love and Light,